Equal Time for Shame

 

Then, in those old days when there were wolves in Wales

And almost nobody was above average except in Lake Woebegone

Where teachers weren’t beat or shot or fired and/or taken off

The sub list (tantamount to) being beat, shot or fired,

We had standards, democracy and a little equity, though

the fat cats have never been terribly fond of that stuff and often

got a pass, old Rothschild, George Bush and King George

and all the rest from as far back as the French Revolution, before

and fast forward to now and tomorrow, though the Romanovs

lost their heads and never learned, but don’t say retarded

because you know that’s not allowed.

 

I’d like to live in a true country where a Donald Trump is ashamed

To claim he made his fortune like the rest of us, walking to campus

In down-at-the-heel shoes because he didn’t have bus fare,

no less a sports car. A true country where Fat Cat Donald,

a million-aire-head while still pooping his dipes,

Is recognized as a fat cat pooping his dipes,

Is despised as a fat cat pooping in his dipes

and his old man’s raping, pillaging and grabbing

 the NY housing development pussy doesn’t become the gold standard

for developers as far and wide as Iowa, where our developers (Mike & Bucky)

now have silver spoons in their diaper poop thanks to ole man Trump.

 

I’d like to live in a true country where, when you buy a concert or plane

Ticket, you get a whole seat instead of three-fourths or seven-eighths

of one because some fat ass has his or her arm in yours and frankly,

I’d like the fat guy whose arm was in my seat last time I flew

to apologize, go on a diet or buy two seats next time. Look,

Amy Schumer’s fat ass isn’t the problem, rather far more basic:

The human frame was not engineered to carry the avoirdupois

of a grizzly, yak or yeti and so the reason most need new knees 

is simply that our we cannot carry what we have managed to lard

onto ourselves, and the shame, nay immorality of this rub is some

folks get no medical care because others are gobbling up

a load of what they should not need.

 

Democracy used to do this for us, but of course, we are losing that

Once upon a time, we kept each other in line and my sisters

Told me point blank the morning of the wedding, “you can’t

Eat breakfast and wear that dress; you’ve gained so much weight

For Shame! You look obscene; we don’t care how much you paid for it!”

Since I am the fat ass of the family, I know just how much shame we had

and how liberally we spread it around—Liberals, socialists, Democrats and

Republicans alike. Equal opportunity shame, I say, for not learning

My times tables, when I was told, shame on you! Now though,

not learning our times tables when you are told gets an IEP, a tutor

And your mother goes up to school and yells at the teacher who

Is taken off the sub list, beaten, shot or fired. Fuck her IPERS.

 

So ladies and gents, boys and girls, tell me this:

What indeed is a Bernie Madoff or a Donnie Trump but a

Small vacumn-packed lack of shame which can cannot

Relate to the pain of losing the little place they raised the kids in

While aggrandizing themselves with 58-bedroom mansions, Rolles,

Pools and we are sending them to jail for their crimes? Pray tell,

People, wouldn’t a little front-end shame do a whole lot more here?

So stand up.

I said, “Stand Up.” Let’s hear a hearty round of applause for shame.

Yeah, Shame! 

March 2023

Portfolio Links:

https://www.csmonitor.com/The-Culture/The-Home-Forum/2016/1228/How-Mom-confounded-the-phone-man

at: 

https://www.desmoinesregister.com/story/opinion/columnists/2019/05/29/substitute-teacher-fired-scolded-students-their-grammar-teaching-education-schools-language-skills/1269842001/ and across the Gannett Syndicate,

and at:

https://secularhumanism.org/2021/06/adventures-of-a-nascent-atheist-abroad/

https://secularhumanism.org/2020/06/toward-a-more-democratic-atheism/

https://secularhumanism.org/2020/10/flipping-god-the-bird-across-the-ages/

(Review of a book called “Unbelievers, an Emotional History of Doubt” published by Harvard Press, an amusing book about the History of Atheism)

https://secularhumanism.org/2023/04/infinity-war-lies-damned-lies-and-superabundance/

(Originally titled “In the Ivory Tower with a Couple Forrest Gumps)

 

Celtic Life International, Newfoundland, Canada

https://celticlifeintl.com/a-song-for-father-francis-part-1/

https://celticlifeintl.com/a-song-for-father-francis-part-2/

behind a pay wall https://www.liguorian.org/contents-27/

Front Porch Review Republished: “Country Kitchens April 2023

https://frontporchreview.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/05/April-2023.pdf

 

in the Times of London July 2023 Education Supplement:

https://www.timeshighereducation.com/depth/are-student-demands-higher-grades-threatening-standards